********** SISTER DIANNA ORTIZ BEGINS FAST ***********
STATEMENT OF SISTER DIANNA ORTIZ
April 22, 1996
For the past three weeks, I have spent my days and nights
in front of the White House, holding a silent vigil for
TRUTH--the truth about my case and the truth about all
those Guatemalans who have suffered and died at the hands
of the officially sponsored death squads, for years
supported with U.S. dollars. While some U.S. officials may
have been moved by my vigil, others have stated to me that
I seem comfortable in the park. Others, still, have
relegated my vigil to the category of irrational whim. One
official remarked, "Declassification will happen. It's too
bad that Dianna feels like she has to sit in front of the
White House in the meantime. It's her choice."
But is it my choice? I have listened patiently to
explanations for six years. For six years, I've been told
to wait. I've attended meeting after meeting. Each month
I have expected the results of the Intelligence Oversight
Board's inquiry, which was supposed to have been concluded
last July. I have filed a FOIA request. I still do not
have my documents. If I am in the park, it is because I
need the truth, and my options have been gradually
eliminated.
I appreciate the White House officials who have taken time
to meet with me. I especially appreciate the willingness
of Hillary Rodham Clinton to speak with me on April 4. I
believe Mrs. Clinton is in good faith trying her best to
help me. I know that the documents I seek do not belong to
her, but to the CIA, the Department of State, the
Department of Defense, and other government agencies. Yet
our government could choose to order the declassification
of information for victims and survivors of human rights
abuses in Guatemala.
Since January, twenty-seven people have been tortured in
Guatemala. Eighty-one have been murdered for political
reasons. The hundreds of thousands of people in Guatemala
who have lost loved ones to torture and murder, who are
struggling to recover from heinous forms of torture, who
are desperately trying to prosecute human rights violators
and break the cycle of impunity that allows the atrocities
to continue need the information.
The release of documents does not necessarily mean that the
truth will be allowed to surface. When documents are
eventually declassified by the U.S. government, they are
oftentimes blacked out almost in their entirety and the
paragraphs that we are allowed to read are usually the most
meaningless of paragraphs. I want the TRUTH, not just
documents. I want to know who Alejandro is. I want to
know why our government has protected him. I want to know
why a U.S. citizen had the authority to supervise and give
orders to my torturers. Until I receive this information,
I cannot heal.
In recent weeks, with so much fear, I opened the lid of my
Pandora's box and shared with the world what I experienced
and witnessed at the hands of the Guatemalan security
forces and Alejandro, the U.S. citizen. You may think this
strange; but even at this moment, I can sense the presence
of my torturers. I can smell the torturers. I can feel
their monstrous hands on my body, I can hear them hissing
in my ear that I am the one who killed the woman. I can
see them blessing me with the blood of the woman. Will
this end?
Will this end? Jean Am@)@ry, an Austrian philosopher
tortured by the Gestapo, said, "Anyone who has been
tortured remains tortured. Anyone who has suffered torture
never again will be at ease in the world, the abomination
of the annihilation is never extinguished. Faith in
humanity, already cracked by the first slap in the face,
then demolished by torture, is never acquired again."
It is with great horror that I repeat these words.
Torture, for him, was an interminable death. Am@)@ry took
his life in 1978.
I want so desperately to live. I want so desperately to
believe in humanity again ... to be free of Alejandro and
all my Guatemalan torturers. Thousands of Guatemalans who
have been tortured by the security forces also want to live
and to believe in humanity again. Only the truth will set
us free.
Because I am still barred from knowing the truth, because I
am still in a prison of silence, because U.S. government
agencies deny me access to the documents that could allow
me to recover my life, I will now begin a fast of bread and
water, continuing my silent vigil in front of the White
House and daring to place my life in the hands of the U.S.
government.
Weathering the heavy rains, harsh sun, blustery winds and
cold temperatures has not been easy. But what I have found
most difficult to weather is the tempest of memories that
everyday life in the park has unleashed: the sight of a
uniformed police officer walking past me or stopping to
enlighten me on park regulations reminds me of the
policeman who raped and tortured me ... the smell of
cigarettes reminds me of the cigarettes that were used to
brand my body ... the clicking and flashing of cameras as
tourists sweep toward the White House, video cameras in
tow, call me back to that room where my torturers used
these as weapons against me... the stream of questions from
journalists, tourists, and supporters reminds me of the
interrogation.
During my torture, I was lowered into an open pit. Rats
were dropped onto me. At one point, I passed out and when
I awoke, rats were all over me. The first night of my
vigil a police officer approached me and told me about the
rats in the park--rats the size of cats that snuggle up
next to you for warmth when you're asleep. I don't sleep.
I fight to stay awake. When I go home at 5:00 in the
morning for my hour of rest in a bed, my body is so sore
from the ground that I have to pile pillows on top of the
mattress. Although loving and concerned people bring me
all sorts of food, I have lost ten pounds in the twenty-two
days of my vigil. And as my weight drops, the ground gets
harder.
The dark I live in ten hours a day reminds me of that cell
where I waited for my torturers' hands, the blindfold that
kept my eyes from their faces. But whether I am in the
park or out of the park, the darkness of the blindfold is
with me. This time, it is not my torturers who conceal
their identity from me. It is the U.S. government.
Whether I am in or out of the park, I am still in a
clandestine cell, in the dark, waiting, wondering what will
happen. My hands are tied. I cannot move forward. It is
the U.S. government who keeps me with the policemen, bound
hand and foot, in the dark, with the rats. It is the U.S.
government who controls information about the event that
haunts me, who could ensure that Alejandro and my
Guatemalan torturers will never torture again, and that no
one else in Guatemala will ever have to live this HELL.
Saint Augustin said, "Hope has two daughters--anger and
courage: anger at the way things are and the courage to
work to make things other than they are."
I say, enough is enough! I demand that the U.S. government
stop playing games and stop toying with the lives of
people. Give me and the people of Guatemala the TRUTH! We
have a right to know the TRUTH.
***********************************************************
For more information, please contact the Guatemala Human
Rights Commission/USA at 202-529-6599. Journalists should
also feel free to contact Jose Pertierra, Esq., at 202-783-
6666; Michelle Arington, Esq., 202-383-6722; Anna
Gallagher, Esq., 301-588-806
Maryann Bell
Assistant Dean
Social & Behavioral Sciences
Melville Library - 2nd fl.
University at Stony Brook
Stony Brook, NY 11794-3391
Phone: 516-632-6190
FAX: 516-632-6900
E-Mail: mabell@provos2.prov.sunysb.edu